> ## Content Index > Fetch the complete content index at: https://www.grumpybuck.com/llms.txt > Use this file to discover other available public pages before exploring further. # The Lakers Have No Lakes: 5 Team Names That Stopped Making Sense (And 2 That Accidentally Got Better) - URL: https://www.grumpybuck.com/the-lakers-have-no-lakes-5-team-names-that-stopped-making-sense-and-2-that-accidentally-got-better/ - Published: 2026-09-01T21:24:41.000Z - Updated: 2026-09-01T21:24:41.000Z - Author: Brad Riddell - Tags: Sports History Team names are souvenirs. When a franchise moves, the name usually comes along in the boxes — and sometimes what made perfect sense in one city becomes gibberish in the next. Here are the 5 most gloriously out-of-place names in American sports, plus 2 that relocation accidentally improved. ## 5\. Memphis Grizzlies ![Big Country: Bryant Reeves in the teal — the Grizzlies when the name still made geographic sense](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/disp-bigcountry.jpg) Big Country: Bryant Reeves in the teal — the Grizzlies when the name still made geographic sense ![FedExForum, Memphis — 1,500 miles from the nearest wild grizzly (public domain)](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/disp-fedexforum.jpg) FedExForum, Memphis — 1,500 miles from the nearest wild grizzly (public domain) Born in Vancouver in 1995 and named for the grizzly bear native to British Columbia — after the first choice, "Mounties," was blocked by an objection from the actual Royal Canadian Mounted Police. Six years later the team moved to Memphis, where the nearest wild grizzly lives roughly 1,500 miles away. Tennessee has black bears. It does not have grizzlies. The name is now a zoology error with a jersey. ## 4\. Indianapolis Colts ![The Evening Sun, March 29, 1984: ](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/clip-disp-colts-1984.jpg) The Evening Sun, March 29, 1984: "Team sneaks off to Indianapolis" — with the Mayflower van in the snow The Baltimore Colts were named in a 1947 fan contest for Maryland's horse-racing heritage — Pimlico, the Preakness, the whole breeding industry. The name made so much sense it hurt. Then came the night of March 28-29, 1984: 15 Mayflower moving vans loaded up the team's entire existence in 8 hours and rolled out of Baltimore in the dark on a snowy, sleet-slicked night — each truck taking a different route to dodge the Maryland State Police, because the state Senate had just passed a bill to seize the team by eminent domain. Indianapolis got a wonderful franchise and a name about another state's racetrack. ## 3\. Calgary Flames ![The Atlanta Flames and the flaming A — a hockey team named for the burning of its own city](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/disp-flames-action.jpg) The Atlanta Flames and the flaming A — a hockey team named for the burning of its own city The darkest origin on the list: the Atlanta Flames, born 1972, were named for the burning of Atlanta — General Sherman's 1864 march. An expansion team named after the destruction of its own city. When the franchise moved to Calgary in 1980, the new owners reportedly kept the name because it accidentally fit an oil town — gas flares over the prairie. A name commemorating a Civil War inferno, quietly rebranded as a petroleum reference. Nobody blinked. ![What the name commemorates: Atlanta in ruins, 1865 (public domain)](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/disp-atlanta-1865.jpg) What the name commemorates: Atlanta in ruins, 1865 (public domain) ## 2\. Los Angeles Lakers ![George Mikan — the first superstar of the LAKE era (public domain press photo)](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/disp-mikan.jpg) George Mikan — the first superstar of the LAKE era (public domain press photo) The purest one. Minneapolis: Land of 10,000 Lakes, home of the Lakers from 1947, George Mikan dynasty and all. Los Angeles, where they moved in 1960: a city famous for almost everything except lakes. Sixty-five years of championships later, the name is so iconic nobody remembers it's a Minnesota geography lesson — which is exactly what makes it perfect. ![The Lakers' lake-free home today. Photo: CC BY-SA 4.0](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/disp-crypto-arena.jpg) The Lakers' lake-free home today. Photo: CC BY-SA 4.0 ## 1\. Utah Jazz ![The Daily Iberian, June 9, 1979: ](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/clip-disp-jazz-1979.jpg) The Daily Iberian, June 9, 1979: "Fans shrug off shift by Jazz to Salt Lake City" ![The Delta Center, Salt Lake City — where the Jazz will always be the Jazz. Photo: CC BY-SA 4.0](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/disp-delta-center.jpg) The Delta Center, Salt Lake City — where the Jazz will always be the Jazz. Photo: CC BY-SA 4.0 The undisputed champion. The New Orleans Jazz, born 1974, carried the perfect name — the city that invented the music. Five years later the franchise moved to Salt Lake City, and the writer David Halberstam summed up "Utah Jazz" as a rare contradiction in terms. Here's the kicker: it could have been fixed. In 2012, New Orleans' new NBA owner wanted the Jazz name back for his team. Utah's owner refused flatly — "We are the Utah Jazz. And we always will be." New Orleans became the Pelicans instead, and the most beautifully wrong name in sports stayed put. ## Honorable Mentions ![Daily News, Oct 9, 1957: ](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/clip-disp-dodgers-1957.jpg) Daily News, Oct 9, 1957: "It's All Over, Fellows, The Dodgers Go West" — Dick Young writes the obituary ![Ebbets Field's first game, April 1913 — built by and for people who dodged trolleys to get there (public domain)](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/disp-ebbets-1913.jpg) Ebbets Field's first game, April 1913 — built by and for people who dodged trolleys to get there (public domain) The \*\*Los Angeles Dodgers\*\* are named for Brooklyn pedestrians dodging trolleys in the 1890s — a name that moved in 1958 to the city that killed the streetcar. The \*\*Tennessee Oilers\*\* existed for 2 full seasons (1997-98) — an oil-boom name in a state with essentially no oil — before mercifully becoming the Titans. The \*\*Arizona Cardinals\*\* are a trick entry: the name isn't the bird, it's a color — from faded used jerseys a founder bought in 1901 and declared "cardinal red" — so it's equally wrong everywhere. And the \*\*Hornets\*\* pulled off a name round trip: Charlotte's name spent 11 years in New Orleans before the two cities swapped identities back in 2013-14 — proof it can be done, Utah. ![Genevieve Ebbets throws the first pitch at her father's ballpark, 1913 (public domain)](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/disp-ebbets-firstpitch.jpg) Genevieve Ebbets throws the first pitch at her father's ballpark, 1913 (public domain) ## The Two That Got Better ![Indianapolis Star, Feb 14, 1957: ](https://storage.ghost.io/c/6a/b0/6ab0eb2f-edcf-411e-aaff-39e6be3d4e39/content/images/2026/08/clip-disp-zollner-1957.jpg) Indianapolis Star, Feb 14, 1957: "Zollners May Decide Detroit Move Today" — the piston factory heads to the Motor City Relocation occasionally improves a name. The Fort Wayne \*\*Zollner Pistons\*\* were named for owner Fred Zollner's piston factory — and in 1957 they moved to Detroit, the Motor City, where the name became accidentally perfect. And the second Washington Senators became the \*\*Texas Rangers\*\* in 1972, trading a generic government name for actual legendary lawmen. Somewhere, the Utah Jazz takes notes and does nothing.